Sunday, November 21, 2010

a life in waiting

I feel like so much of our life is simply waiting.
Wasteful, wasteful waiting.

I waited...
for 9th grade [once you're in high school life doesn't get any better]
to turn 16 [once you have your driver's license life doesn't get any better]
for graduation [once you're in college, life doesn't get any better]
to get engaged [once you're engaged, life doesn't get any better]
for graduation (again) [once you're done with college, life doesn't get any better]
to get married [once you're married, life doesn't get any better]

And here I am.
Waiting.
Again.
It's a never ending cycle.

It seems we are never satisfied.
Why is that?
I wonder if it's a flaw, if I should be satisfied.
Content where I am at.
Or if maybe it's how I'm supposed to be. How we're supposed to be. Unsatisfied.
Cause when you're unsatisfied, life can always get better.
And that's what we need. People who know that life can be better and do something to make it that way.

But I don't want to waste my life away in waiting.
I can be unsatisfied and looking forward to what God has in store,
but I can also live in today right?
I wonder how that's supposed to look. Cause I don't think I'm doing it right.

1 comment:

  1. I've had those thoughts about once a day ever since I started my stay at home life with time to actually think, but I have never been able to get those feelings out as easily it seems you put it down.

    I agree, we aren't supposed to be satisfied. If we were, wouldn't that suck too? If I were satisfied, I would be full with all kinds of guilty thoughts and selfish feelings. Being satisfied just isn't on my radar of possibility. I think the day to day feelings should be of gratefulness, because oh we have so much to be grateful for!

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