celebrity boyfriend

Everyone, meet my boyfriend.
Boyfriend, meet everyone.

Chris Brown and I have an on-again-off-again type of relationship (besides the fact that it is always "off-again" because it's Chris Brown and he has no idea I exist...)  I mean, I've loved the dude for like, ever, but sometimes I forget that I love him. And then I see something like this:

And I'm all, "Oh hiiiii boyfriend! I missed you!"

Did you just watch that video?
Did you see him dancing?
Are you dead?
I thought so. Cause there is no way you just watched that video and DIDN'T DIE from those dance moves.
Ooooo, Chris Brown, you and your marvelous moves. 

 And I know, I know, he was abusive with Rhianna. And I should probably be "anti-Chris Brown cause he's a jerk" just like I'm "anti-Kanye West cause he's the biggest jerk ever and I hate him" but seriously...I can't get over those dance moves. So I'll just have to sweep that whole "sent his girlfriend to the hospital thing" under the rug.

Ryan, it will probably be to your benefit to learn how to dance like that. And by that, we all know I mean I want to brag to my friends about my husband's awesome dance moves, so...get on that. Also, I may or may not return your birthday presents in exchange for dance lessons. I know, best wife ever. You don't need to tell me.